The Bowling League

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Why?

In October, 1993, Michael Jordan walked away from the Chicago Bulls at the height of his NBA power. With championship rings on three of his fingers, Jordan told a shocked sports world that “the desire isn’t there.” The cover of Sports Illustrated had an image of the three-time champ walking away, accompanied by the lonely word “Why?” The city of Chicago was devastated, and basketball fans everywhere mourned the loss of such a singular talent.

Eighteen years later, the city of Los Angeles was left in the same stunned silence after the eerily similar retirement announcement of Mac “The Dude” Avery. The owner of the Jackie Treehorns (and Voltron-esque combo team called the “Little Lebowski Urban Treehorns”) is walking away from The Bowling League with three championship rings in the nine season history of the LACBL. As with MJ, JMA didn't feel the same desire to keep playing. Still the most feared FBB owner in the league, Avery’s departure leaves a huge void.

Jordan walked away from basketball to seek a new challenge in a new sport, as he tried his hand at professional baseball. His stint in baseball could only be described in Hobbesian terms - “nasty, brutish, and short.” Jordan returned a few years later, stringing together three more titles before walking away for the final time (editor’s note: the “Michael Jordan” who played for the Washington Wizards years later was of no relation, and the shared name is merely coincidental).

Again, the parallels between Jordan and Avery are uncanny. Avery leaves fantasy baseball to focus on a new challenge in the new sport of pool. League owners and fans hope that Avery’s career continues to follow the Jordan trajectory via a return to Los Angeles one day. Fortunately for Avery, but unfortunate for those hoping for a return, Mac is infinitely better at pool than Jordan was at baseball. As such, we offer a few final words to honor the passing of the Jackie Treehorns, an LACBL pioneer:

“Mac was a good owner, and a good man. He was one of us. He was a man who loved the outdoors... and fantasy baseball, and the Bowling League. And as a professional body boarder he explored the beaches of Southern California, from La Jolla to San Luis Obispo, and... up to... Pismo. He died, like so many young men of his generation, he died before his time. In your wisdom, Lord, you took him, as you took so many bright flowering young men at Khe Sanh, at Langdok, at Hill 364. These young men gave their lives. And so would Mac. Mac, who loved the Bowling League. And so, James Macalister Avery, in accordance with what we think your dying wishes might well have been, we commit your final mortal remains to the bosom of the Pacific Ocean, which you loved so well. Good night, sweet prince.”